Thursday 17 June 2021
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No one owes you marriage even after years of dating

We need to understand that people are allowed to stop loving you and they are allowed to leave even if you have been dating for years and have had kids together. People are also allowed to want to find love with someone else and we should learn to accept it because that’s just the reality that comes with life.

We tend to categorise people who leave their partners as cruel but tell me would you rather get married to someone who does not truly want to be with you nor bring you the much needed happiness just because you guys have been dating for years or would you rather find someone that’s really good for you?

We need to realise that we as humans evolve and grow each and every day, certain things about us change as well and yes this includes the love we once had for someone. I don’t know why many of us out here think that years of dating should equal marriage because that’s just not enough.

We tend go around claiming that people who leave their partners have wasted the time these partners could have spent looking for someone else. But I believe that the blame game should not only be applied on one side.

We are all well aware of when things don’t seem to be working out but most of us tend to overlook all the red flags hoping for change and then act surprised when our partners leave. When someone doesn’t like you enough they will show you that they don’t, so save yourself the heartache and stop feeding yourselves with lies that a relationship will get better.

I’ve come to realise that the number or years or the tough hurdles most couples have over come together does not always guarantee a happy ever after nor does it guarantee a happy home.

Most of our grandparents have made it look easy but this is because in their era some of them who had children before marriage were forced into getting married because no family wanted disgraced bought upon them. And it’s a pity how that has carried on in many married families, many parents are living together in unhappy circumstances which they wish they could get out of but because of their kids people would always advise them to stay together which I for one think should not be that way.

We can no longer marry for the sake of looking good in front of others because if we continue this way we will continue to carry on generational unhappiness. We need to break that chain and it starts with us realising that.

We should move away from the notion that the young generation knows nothing about true love, because I believe that the young generation are now well aware of the importance of marrying into a home where there will be happiness and not a home where partners are not able to stand each other.

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