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Sunday 21 April 2019
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We’re in this together

…things men wish pregnant women knew

Both men and women are wired differently and sometimes trying to understand the other sex can be so confusing. Men would wonder why women are so emotional while women wonder why men are not really in touch with their emotions. These genetic makeup differences mostly come to play during pregnancy. A woman might feel that her partner is not offering her enough support and the male partner may be drowning in confusion not knowing how to accommodate her mood swings and cravings.

Indeed, being pregnant is not only a woman’s job the male partner also has a role in it to play. Of course it may seem like men are only left to watch from the outside but pregnancy requires a man’s intricate involvement, biologically, psychologically and emotionally.

The pregnancy process can be perplexing to men especially considering the mood swings and morning sickness of their partners. This could be the reason why some of them end up backing away instead of stepping up to support their women when they need them most.

A father to an eight (8) month old daughter, Adolf Kaure says that during his wife’s pregnancy there was so much he wished he had known. “Speaking of the cravings it was difficult for me to relate to what she craved for because we (men) don’t go through that.

But regardless, it is something that I trained myself to get used to. I learnt that it was her hormones that caused moods and I was always willing to be patient and endure. Another thing for me, she will always remain beautiful no matter how big she becomes during pregnancy. In fact, the pregnancy glow made her even more beautiful,” expressed Adolf.

Adolf describes the whole process as a great transformation. “I started being more humble because I knew that I have someone who will one day look up to me and should therefore always watch what I say or do. I am now also closer to God because I want to lead by example and see my daughter grow up knowing God.

Nevertheless, Adolf says that the pregnancy process was not the way he envisioned it to be. “I actually thought it would be more stressful. However, apart from the sleepless nights of making sure my wife and the baby were fine, it was indeed very enjoyable.

We had a great doctor who gave us great advice and when my girl was born on 21 February, there was no better feeling in the world,” he exclaimed.

Gellah Ndangoh is also a father of a five (5) month old baby and says the whole pregnancy process is amazing. It’s really hard to understand a pregnant woman because at one moment she’s happy and the other she’s not. The one moment you have to and go buy chocolate and when you bring the chocolate you took so long to get, she wants ice cream instead.

One morning she might wake up and decide she’s not talking to you and thirty minutes later she is extra happy. Every day is different. Sometimes you try to understand why and then you remember that the person is pregnant. Sometimes the person just wants to bite your head off for no apparent reason but you always remind yourself that it’s the pregnancy,” he expressed.
Despite the confusion Gellah says that everything is worth it. “When you go through that whole process you don’t see it’s worth until the baby is born.

Eventually you forget everything that happened and realise that it was worth going through even though you did not deserve it.

In fact I couldn’t wait for the little one to come and found it very long because it was my first time and I did not know how to react. Women think that we don’t understand what they go through but from a guy’s perspective you really do and at times you just can’t help it but it’s amazing,” he says.

When a woman gets pregnant, so does the male partner. He may not have morning sickness, mood swings or a growing belly, but the transformation he faces could be just as intense.




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