Tuesday 11 May 2021
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The Art of Getting Men

See, first you have to get a man, in order to understand him. By this time DeAndre is probably wondering, “what do you know about men, the closest thing you have to a man is that statute of Jacob Marengo in the Independence museum” whilst a feminist will already be drawing conclusions like; “why should I understand him, he should understand me”, and I’ll just be like “can you guys wait, I didn’t even get to the first paragraph yet”.

I got this really interesting line from the “Girls Trip” movie- “I can have it all if I really wanted to”. And it is true; anybody in this world can get whatever it is that they really and truly want- it’s all about declaring your desire to the universe. However though, when it comes to men, in Namibia to be specific, do not be surprised if you are not the only one having “bae issues” with your bae. Because chances are  that exact guy that you are praying for- some other girl is also praying for, or already has.

Understanding Men
My understanding of men is that they are possessive, selfish beings. Men-are those things that do not care about anyone else but themselves. I fail to comprehend just how women beat each other up over such things – we should actually be working together as a pack of wolverines and attack those sons of mothers.

Like when you find your bae cheating on you, beat his sorry ass not the other woman who was also just wowed into fornication like you….chances are that he’s going to apologise, and say it is a mistake. Begging for forgiveness with his love sick puppy eyes, like you can literally see remorse in his eyes- Laliful.

Because you’re a woman, they know you’re weak and forgiving in nature, you’ll forgive- change that. Because when the tables turn, you’ll never hear the end of it – That’s if you can still breath because he will slaughter you.

You can just tell that we are meant to be inferior to men, even the Bible says so, I have a feeling it was written by a man (how many female books are there in that book anyway? all I ever read was Mark, Luke, John and they are not even gay to say they are feminine). But anyways, the point is maybe we should just remain as such, subordinates to manhood, domesticated sex slaves and child bearing machines who should never utter their true feelings.

Getting Men
Okay you probably want me to get to the point of “how to get men” right. Well if you refer back to my first sentence you will realise that I do not have such tips- I do not wanna share them, lol.

You know why, because that’s the problem right there, you never want to think on your own, you just want to read “get this fast” schemes. These writings are concocted by single women, who do not have it all- don’t you ever wonder, why haven’t they used their own tactics to get a man for themself?  Could it be that it is all a sham? That it does not actually work – it’s just a theory. You should know by now that most things we learn in theory seem to really take different routes in reality, it’s about time we understand that.

But here is a tip, you do not need a man to be complete (says a single lady).

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