Sunday 16 May 2021
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Is there such a thing as a perfect partner?

If yes, where are they? A partner is only perfect if you accept them with their flaws, perfect imperfections and all. If you do not accept your partner`s flaws, you`ll keep complaining about their snoring, how they burp or the way they stutter.

For you to begin to categorise one as a partner, there needs to be some form of attraction or admiration first. You then build on that. When you meet a potential significant other, you barely know them.

So you start with the obvious, getting to know each other. After various dates, you either like them more or get turned off. You make a well considered choice and see if he/she is the person for you and accept them as they are.

One thing I believe remains true when it comes to healthy relationships is that they get better with time. With every argument that goes by, every misunderstanding, you learn about your partner`s flaws and downfalls, but you still can`t imagine going through it with anyone else. And you wouldn’t want anyone to get to know them like you do. The relationship grows stronger.

If you can`t accept the person in their current state with no potential, no promises, no future plans, it will not get better. Spare yourself the time, the effort and the energy because people do not change every day for the betterment of a relationship.

Better be on your own than wishing you could have done differently, or wondering how to end a relationship that you are no longer interested in without hurting your partner`s feelings.
Relationships seem are like games these days. A game of who doesn’t get attached or who moves on the quickest. But they shouldn’t be.

Even if your feelings are genuine, it does not guarantee that your partner`s feelings will be. Most of my friends are single and they keep asking themselves if they are looking in the wrong places. Good guys just seem to be nowhere to find.

The right partner will come. You cannot love a few things about your partner. You have to love them in their entirety. What makes a partner perfect for you is the package that they have to offer. Which includes looks, educational background, and religious beliefs, personality, culinary skills or the lack thereof, etc.

Of course, there will always be someone who is better looking, more educated, cooks better and goes to church more than your partner does. But a perfect partner will have all these in just the right proportion. Not more, not less.

So, until you find that person, it’s not love. Until then, the people you entertain romantically are merely place holders for your soul mate.  You cannot say to yourself “I love him, but if only he dressed better, or had more money” You can only begin to love someone when you accept them as they are. Bypass the flaws, only then you`ll see a perfect partner.

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