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Sunday 20 January 2019
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Mara why do you care?

I just got dumped again last week, but it’s not like you ever cared. In fact, I don’t expect you to care because you are next and I will give zero f*ck. Today I want to vent my frustration on people who care so much even about things that don’t poke them.

With my little attempt to read the bible and associate myself with good people, who are mostly from church, I have come to understand that God has created space for his friend’s (Satan) people and those who live by the book. I hate thieves but I know they have space in society. I hate alcohol and whoever buys it for me but I also know that this idiots bring us some laughter in life. So, it pokes my rectum with displeasure when people just care about the smoothness of the toilet paper that doesn’t wipe their anus lips.

I don’t enjoy throwing insults around and coming out like some child with zero manners maara some people really just want to look like the insults I throw out.

You here complaining about girls making babies left, right and centre but you too are a product of forbidden sex. Fornication if you ever opened a bible. So you cannot be here preaching about safe sex and sex after marriage but last time the church saw your butt was in your parents’ wedding photo. Mxxxm. People like you are the idiots who think everyone is gonna step on the altar.

You are nearly 30 and there has never been a wedding celebration in your house except numerous baptisms, confirmations and birthday parties. So why the f*ck to you care about your neighbour’s girls falling pregnant with the fear that they will never get married. Sobisoo you live with your stepmother so first get your biological parents to the altar before nyaka-nyakaring about marriages here. And where is your stoflap man who has promised you a wedding since you got a job but never delivered? So wait until you are off the shelves, otherwise you are just on layby like the rest.

And do you know what, not every Facebook celebrity is a whore neh. They are just beautiful and there are people out there who are not a stingy to appreciate good looks. And even if she was a whore, does she rent out your private parts ? Does she ask you to escort her or does she come to you asking for taxi money to go tender her private fingses. And it’s called private organs, so how do you find it right to make it your public concern. Mxxxxm.

There will always be people who are known in every space be it in entertainment or where they are giving free things. Like you know, I have my friend Kasape who is almost everywhere. She is like that guy who is the mutual friend to every strange looking person sending you a friend request. But why do you care?

We have left so many things unquestioned. Do you remember that kachick in Tate Buti’s music video ‘Efenge’ of 2007? We never asked how she could quatradinhu almost 10 years now. And we still don’t ask where she is now because we know life happens. Just like we never asked why our second president never seem to found his pants size or why our Harambee architect never asks his Valentine’s package ‘Where were you?’ Let me leave the elders out. As Steve Komphela would say after spending a day in Eveline Street – Cats are born with beards and Afrikaans is the only subject Damaras pass in high school.

And just like you have the freedom to breath, why do you care about madam coming from one relationship to another? Nobody throws away their undies when they are dirty. You wash them and still put them on and walk like you are doing it all over again.

And I have observed that this hating tendency is mostly with poor people. I’m sorry but poor people are sometimes just full of shit. Sometimes they just go on like ugly people who hate everybody not created in their shadow. I go to work for 31 days, just for you to come tell me how to spend my money, really. You don’t even wake me up.

God has created people who are reapers and we call them Kandeshis, they would not exist if you all never took your hands out of your pockets. We need to understand that God created lazy people with the brains. They do not have the brains to go to school, no, not that type. They only see opportunities where there is the blind with money. And they are not gold diggers, they just know how to work for lesser days and still get the same money you only get after 31 days. And don’t call them prostitutes because we all are. The only difference is that those who stand on the street corners are honest about it. They get money for sex and you get dinners, gifts, kindness, empty promises and sometimes you just get showers with broke compliments for sex. So who’s winning?

Worry no more just because they say you are bad. At least you are still useful because we can use you as a bad example. Yes, we can use you as a living testimony of life gone wrong. So let’s stop playing the child who steals the parents’ money and helps them look for it. You are not perfect either and let people live the way they wish. Stop making noise because not everything needs your approval.
Lastly, whoever believes the above crap is destined to be that idiot we will point at as the fool who thought they were smarter than the whole world.

I love to hate you
Sharpies…




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