As a Christian I was taught that in life there is a season for everything. There is a season to laugh and celebrate. A season to cry as you are filled with sorrow and finally a season to be still and know that He is God as His greatness is beyond measure.
Our faith is tested when we feel like the season of sorrow has become permanent as it seems to be never ending. In life there are three constants: change, death and God. Death brings about a permanent change in our lives. It is one of the inevitable changes that occur all too often yet we as people can never fully comprehend it or fully accept the departure of our loved ones.
I lost my father recently and words cannot describe profound heartache and pain. A pain so severe that words become inadequate to vocalize what is felt from deep within. As a family, we were perplexed and wondered why He has allowed the shadow of death to come upon us.
How does one forget someone who gave you so much to remember? How do you continue to lead a normal life right after such a dramatic change? For a moment your entire life comes to a standstill. I can attest to this period. I felt like the clock had stopped ticking and all I had to do was dig my head under the ground.
I had never imagined that the Lord would allow me to go through such a dark phase and that my world would change within a blink of an eye. I started to question my faith. “God if you are so great where are you now that I need you the most?” Like a nightmare I had to relive it each morning. It had become my reality. No amount of condolences, flowers, hugs and messages would ease the pain nor bring back the life that was no more.
I opened my eyes and soon realized that I wasn’t the only one going through this season. I looked at my friends and other family members that had gone through the very same phase. They are Christian too and I wondered how they continued to walk through the storms. How they managed to continue loving even though they may have felt like a vital organ had been taken away.
I remembered that the God of Abraham, Joseph is faithful. I looked back at all that God has done for me. He lifted me up from so many muddy roads, He forgave me even when He didn’t have to and protected me from so many evils. Through it all He has never forsaken me so why would I have to question his greatness’ today if he has been more than faithful.
I then had to make a decision. On my knees I ask God for strength. I said “Lord I may not realise what you are doing or why you allowed this to happen but give me the power to hold on and face the new day.” Everyday remains to be a challenge but because I look to the cross knowing that this too shall pass, I soothes my soul. I know that my journey continues and that I have a purpose to fulfill.
Dear reader if you are going through a season of darkness, trust in God’s timing as a new season is on its way. Daddy, rest in peace !