Namibians have been secretly accustomed to pornography acted out by those from countries where firstly, prostitution is legal and secondly, the film industry in those countries is established.
Also noteworthy is the fact that the Namibians seem to have been heavily influenced and the production of pornographic videos. Featuring our very own seems to be the new trend. There is almost one every third week of someone known.
The recent trend has received these heavy scrutiny by the public as it is seen to vilify women. At most, these videos, which mostly only feature the identity of the woman at the receiving end, are introduced to the public without the consent of the woman.
What happens is that during sexual pleasure, the one partner (in most cases the man) decides to film their activities for reasons only known to the two. In an unanticipated event, the video is fed to the public and the main character (mostly the woman) is laid bare to shame and all the horrible things society can bring.
From name calling, shaming, insults and attacks – just to mention a few. Such becomes the life of the main actor in these video. We cannot deny the harm and tarnishing of the person’s reputation. Without pointing fingers on who to blame, The Lounge engaged a few readers on social media (Facebook) to give their opinion of the recent trend. This is what they has to say:
Hanayi Shakes Bantwini: I think that the problem lies with the man for thinking that they’re more superior to women. This trend shows just how immature men can be. You can’t tell me that woman are at fault here because they fully trust the man. And, sometimes there are hidden cameras and men take videos without their (woman) knowledge.
Albertina Tchemunyenge Nujoma-Naftal: It’s so wrong, disrespectful and pathetic. Every women in this world looks exactly like their mother. Men must stop this crap.
James Starry Shock: The two partners are stupid.
Helen Shikongo: Exposing women by leaking sex tapes is a sign of immaturity. No matter what happened between the two people, they should still respect each other. Whatever happened behind closed doors should remain there. Men should learn to accept when things didn’t go their way. I can’t blame the women because they allow this things as a form of expressing their love.
Ndova Kooko: It is idiotic.
Wilka Tunchy Lavoka: Man can really be sh**ty sometimes but let’s look on both sides. What about the women who allow themselves to be taped or send the man pictures of their private parts? They are also partially at fault. Women, if that guy wants to see any part of your body, he should come see it in person as it’s more realistic. And don’t tell me that crap of kama doing it because you love him. If he dumps you because you don’t want to take nudes, then let it be so. Don’t lose your dignity because of him.
Mpingana YaTate: What happened behind closed doors should remain as such. It is indeed a disgrace to avail those intimacy moments to the general public or so. From the look of things, Namibian men need psychological help so that they can stop doing such crap.
Linda N Lisha: It shows that the individual that taped the video has no morals and he doesn’t have a mother.
Priscila Shaamena: Some men refuse to appear weak or used after being left by their partner hence they resort to exposing their sexual partners as a way to show her weakness. Personally, I suggest that people simply learn how to break up without any drama. What happened during the relationship remains as such and people continue with their lives.
Rightfully put it is evident that after a sex tape is released to the public, lives are affected and it is often difficult to stand up and live a normal life. The trend started with young students but recent exposed videos now feature elderly figures, married for that matter.
Although the fingers point mostly to men as the main culprits, Relationship expert Ngamane Karuaihe-Upi is of the opinion that it is rather a decision devoid of any sense.
“It is unfortunate that we live in a society where smart people do stupid things and producing a sex tape is one of them. Recording yourself in a sex tape is one of the most stupid thing to do in the world,” the expert said blatantly.
He supports his opinion by saying sex is a private affair, just like using the toilet hence there is no need to record it. Being completely against the initial idea of filming sex, Ngamane says, “If the sex is so tasty, you would want to do it over and over again – and not to tape it. There is thus no need for the video.”
Ngamane says it is unfortunate that we live in a society where women dignity and rights are denied. If we were to respect women, we would not do this. He called for a rigorous sex and moral education at all levels and environments, saying until the power dynamics of society changes, this will just be another topic.
Those with depth knowledge of these tapes might have come to the reality that 95 percent if not more, it is only the woman exposed – a move Ngamane says is intended to denigrate women.
“We live in a world where women are seen as just sex objects. Sex objects can be brutally translated as [email protected]#k things, and that is how women are seen. So all this sex tape things are deliberate conspiracy on the part of men to denigrate women. And what is even more unfortunate is that we have a lot of women who still want to play along.”
He adds, “If you are going to film your activities, why not do it from both sides such that you are both in the video?”
The damages on reputation and family of the exposed are beyond any comparison as life becomes a nightmare. Think of a mother who is exposed and has to face her children tomorrow. Think of a school girl who is exposed and has to go to school tomorrow and face a gallery of her peers laughing at her. It is not secret that the consequences are severe.
“Find an incident of a women who was exposed and still retaining their power. That is why I say it is stupid because the consequences are severe. So why video tape anything that if and when it is to be exposed you will want to die? Just do not do it,” advised Ngamane.
While the morals and ethics that seem not to be absent when it comes to the exposing trend are at question, the legal arm brings in the violation of rights of the exposed. Under Common Law there is claim for defamation concerning one’s reputation that you can sue someone for distributing obscene pornographic material over the internet. According to Human Rights activist and Lawyer Norman Tjombe, everyone has a constitutional right to their privacy and dignity which in itself are claims that they could pursue.
But under Criminal Law, which is where it get more serious, offenders could go to prison for distributing this material (sex tape). “You do not have to be the originator of the material but you could simply ask it from someone. That act of requesting it from someone else is a criminal offence under our Communication Act and you can go to jail for five years of pay a fine of over N$20 000. So it is a very serious offence that people commit without even knowing.”
At a time where societies are on the forefront of advocating for women’s rights, you do not want to be on the other side of the law when for committing the offence. However, while the legal arm must take its course, society needs to bring back the morals that value the human race regardless of their gender.